Fancy Lad Adventures

Loot 11/11/09

Much loot from several past sessions as well as postings on the website:

  • 1033XP each
  • 283 gold each
  • [Level 8 Magic Item]: Wyrmguard Shield (Adventurer’s Vault, page 122 [Arms Slot Items]) (DDI)
  • [Level 7 Magic Item]: Frost Gauntlets (Adventurer’s Vault, page 133 [Hands Slot Items]) (DDI)
  • [Level 6 Magic Item]: Solitaire (Cinnabar) (Adventurer’s Vault, page 177 [Wondrous Items]) (DDI)
  • [Level 6 Magic Item]: Orb of Impenetrable Escape +2 (Adventurer’s Vault, page 94 [Orbs]) (DDI)
  • [Level 5 Magic Item]: Ironskin Belt (Player’s Handbook, page 253 [Waist Slot Items]) (DDI)

As an option to you all, since the treasure generator I use doesn’t currently include Adventurer’s Vault 2 items, if there’s an item on the list that you’re not interested in I will allow you guys to swap it out for a comparable item from AV2. This is going forward with all loot you guys collect. The catch is that it has to be the same level and fill the same slot.

Don’t forget to update your character sheets with any equipment you choose (I leave it to all of you to decide who gets what).

While You Were Adventuring

“I really miss Simple Stan,” Roderick says.

“Me too,” says Ripp Terrorgrip. “That guys sure had a lot of spunk.”

Everyone but Sylvia chuckles knowingly.

“He would have loved that thing with the empty boxes,” chuckles Gary.

“And the gnomes. He thought gnomes were so silly,” says Emere.

Everyone but Sylvia nods in agreement.

“All he wanted to do was row his boat,”says Hurin.

Sylvia can take it no more. “What are you all talking about?” she says. “Who is this Stan fella?

What empty boxes? I don’t know any gnomes!”

The Fancy Lads look at their feet.

“Well, Sylvia,” says Roderick. “Remember that night that we left you at the bar to pay the tab?”

Sylvia nods.

“We sort of had an adventure without you.”

Sylvia’s green face turns red with rage. “You. Adventured. Without. ME?!”

Emere puts out a hand to touch Sylvia’s shoulder but quickly retreats, thinking better.

“We’re sorry,” shuffles Gary.

“You really would not have cared for Stan, anyway,” Roderick says.

“He was a big of a dick,” says Hurin.

“And lifting empty boxes is not that much fun,” says Emere.

“And gnomes are so short,” chimes Ripp.

Sylvia looks at the faces of her fellow adventurers. She thinks about the night at the bar, abandoned by her companions, sitting alone at a table with a check in-hand. At the time she was very angry, sure she would kill these men the next time she saw them. And she might have. Except the bar tender smiled at her. And because he was very handsome, she smiled back. And then he offered to buy her a drink, and she accepted. She spent many hours at the bar, waiting for the bar tender to get off work. And that’s where she would have stayed of Roderick’s little pest had not come looking for her. And while she did not get to stay with the bar tender as she had planned, she now had something to look forward to when she returned to town.

“You’re right,” she says to Ripp. “Gnomes are too short to care about. And this Stan, with his empty boxes, he sounds dull and ugly.”

“He was,” nods Roderick.

“Okay,” says Sylvia. “Whatever.”

Loot 10/7/09

Better late than never, here’s the loot earned for the big fight down by the docks:

  • 200XP each
  • 225GP each
  • Leather Armor X4
  • Mace x4
  • Dagger X4
  • Hide Armor
  • Greataxe
  • Handaxe X2
  • Breach Bracers (Adventurer’s Vault, page 116 [Arms Slot Items])
  • Fire Beetle Potion (Adventurer’s Vault, page 187 [Consumables])
  • Boots of Spider Climbing (Player’s Handbook, page 246 [Feet Slot Items])
  • Pouncing Beast Armor +1 (Player’s Handbook 2, page 202 [Magic Armor])

And bonus XP:

  • 270XP each

Don’t ever say I didn’t do anything for you…

The story of Emere (a work in progress)

From an early age, many knew Emere was different… different from his family, different from his friends, and all those who shared his tiny community amidst the sands of Calimport. His mother, a simple peasant woman, possessed little but great beauty. A woman desired by many, but whom, herself, desired little; that is, until she met him. He held no title, was just a visiting soldier, but one possessed of great courage, great physical features, and a mysterious and electrifying air about him. In fact, when she gazed at him from her window, she almost thought she saw the air toss and tousle his hair in playful waves, even on days when the wind was hot but still. And his hair, she shyly admitted, was one of his great features… black to the point of being deep blue, altogether like his eyes… deep azure with little flecks of silver that leapt across the iris in playful arcs.

She suspected that he may have been one of the ffolk of the realm, born from the elemental bloodlines that ran strong in this area, but that mattered little to her. His eyes danced, and he noticed her.

The courtship had been quick, a shy smile, and flirtatious word, and in a few months, the two had lain together as man and wife, the itinerant soldier and the proud peasant, and their love and their lust had leapt like so much light in the stormy night sky. It was on their first night together that she discovered his marks, faint tattoos of silver and deepest blue that etched their way across his muscular form – back, arms, torso, and face. The lines were jagged and angular, mimicking the lightning he so loved to watch as it raced through the heavens, lines that she loved to trace with her fingers as he slept.

All too soon, though, he was called off to war. The armies were massing to the north, and so he was called to defend his land. As he left that fall morning, he turned back to her briefly; making quick eye contact with her, but not enough to solicit a smile or a gesture… whatever he saw, she only saw those deep blue eyes.

10 years later, it was those same blue eyes that graced her son’s face, eyes that sparked with a similar light. Emere had been an unusual child, quick tempered, friendly, but possessed of a solitary streak that often got him into trouble. Much like his father, he was quick to react, for better or worse, and much like his father, the air stirred about him, responding to his attitude and whims. As he grew older into manhood, those whims became wilder, and the playful light that had danced now rioted about him… Emere had the unusual talent (or curse) to be able to direct that lightning about him, making it leap from him in increasingly damaging bolts and arcs, until she could no longer control him as only a mother wanted to, nor could she protect him from those who saw his abilities as dangerous or frightening. It was this that eventually convinced her that she had to send Emere out into the world, away from their home and those who might love him, but were still afraid to love him for fear of being hurt.

Much like his father, Emere left in the fall, the cold morning sunlight illuminating the lines of sapphire that traced across his own face and arms, much like his father. As he left, he turned to face his mother, and as their eyes connected, she swore she saw two sets of eyes gazing back at her… father and son spanning 20 years of sorrow and melancholy. But now, her son smiled his quirky grin, waved, and leapt away down the road to seek his fortune.

And in the distance, thunder roared overhead as bolts of lightning traced the morning sky on a day that was sunny and clear.


Penny Arcade

To the Members of the GLF

To the members of the Gnomish Libertion Front.

Re: Your organization

Although I have no personal issues with gnomes in general, I must take this moment and formally lodge a complaint against your organization. Scampering about on roofs and issuing vague, dire warnings is all well and good, but to do so to so great and vainglorious a party as ours does not bode well for your group. The GLF must abandon these guerilla-like tactics that, while adorable, do not engage the public directly if they want their cause to be taken seriously. Please, leave behind the cute badgers of the days of old and move toward a reconciliation with the big folk of the land. In this way, you may validate your cause and bring much-needed laughter to those around you.


Emere, one of the Heroes of Fallcrest.

Addendum: Do not feed the Bear!

Bonus XP Part Deux

Hi all-

Bonus XP awarded to the group (this doesn’t include last night’s session…that will be a separate post) for session and character write-ups is…

  • 673XP each

This should be enough to bump you all up to 4th level, but if it doesn’t then just assume you’re at 4th level and go ahead and level up as appropriate.

Don’t forget, I’m always looking for bonus material posted to the site which can earn you lots of XP. No better (and easier) way to level up then to continue the game outside of our sessions by telling me about your characters past or to review the inns of Fallcrest or tell the tale of how you came to have that scar. Whatever. Really…just let your imaginations run wild and I’ll probably give you bonus XP.

Sad Songs and Waltzes ARE selling this year

The dwarf strides into the middle of the fracas, with a stern look on his face. He always gets irritated when his goons start talking. He pays them for muscle, not for debate.

“Karl? Mutton? What’s going on out here? Yer disturbin’ my pint.”

With an approving nod from Roderick, Goon #1 (Karl) addresses his employer, “Well, boss. These fellows here wuz teachin this other fellow how to carry boxes, but it has somethin to do with insurance purposes as to why his box be empty. The rate structure of their provider doesn’t allow for uninsured new hires to be—“

He is abruptly cut off as the dwarf punches the other boxes our stalwart heroes are carrying and they splinter open, revealing hte nothing trapped inside.

“Then ‘ow do you explain that, Mr. Insurance Structure?”

The guard, realizing that he may have been duped, becomes angry and takes a step towards Roderick, whose mind is flapping furiously in an attempt to find some way to talk his way out of this one.

Rounding on the group, the dwarf bellows, “And why, exactly, are you lot, who are obviously dock workers, carrying empty boxes? Don’t seem right to me. Seems fishy.”

“Um…Well….Er…....,” Roderick stammers and stutters. He’s got nothing.

Gary the Ranger steps forward and addresses the dwarf, “Well you see, sir, times have been hard, and we haven’t been able to find much work. So we thought we might advertise our services through seeming like we’re already doing it…” Roderick picks up on the gambit and begins to play a sad, slow song on his lute to accompany Gary’s tale of economic depression. “Other peoples, they have a chance to get out, their children can grow up to be whatever they want, but our ei—no fifteen children have no choice but to become stevedores like us. IT’S A RIGGED GAME.” Gary remains the very picture of a stoic man holding back tears for the plight of his family.

“Aye, lads. There has been a downturn recently. Ships hain’t been comin in like they used to. Come by tomorrow and I’ll find ya some work.” He checks his watch (do they have watches in D&D) and gestures to his goons. They stride off purposefully and we get the idea that he’s going to an important meeting.

After some back-patting over Gary saving the con, we debate for some time over who will be able to stealthily follow Strongbeard. The debate continues for far too long, and by the time a team is picked to go after him, he is long gone.

The Genasi and Bear-Man, now Owl-Man, take off in the general direction of the dwarf and begin to wind their way through the city streets while the rest of the party has a well-deserved rest after working on the docks all night.

Empty Boxes, Hollow Threats, and Racial Insensitity
The gang plays dress up.

After returning triumphantly from solving The Case of the Busted Fence, our heroes check in with Captain Faringray to see what else is going on about town. The hale and hearty captain informs us that there has been some trouble on the docks as of late, but he hasn’t had the manpower to investigate. Adventure senses a-tingle, we jump at the chance to rough up some stevedores and head into town to check it out.

The local hostler who keeps his stable in town is known locally as a purveyor of strange rumors and town gossip. A halfling by the name of Lannar Thistleton, he seems the shifty, seedy type of man who keeps track of t he comings and goings of the town populous.

“Hail and well met, fair hostler, what news can you bring us of the local maritime trade?” exclaims Roderick, upon entering the stable.

The halfling darts his beady eyes back and forth, then his whole face brightens into a toothsome grin and he replies amiably, “Well, I can’t say for much on what goes on round these parts. I tend to go to bed early and don’t fall in with the riff raff of town. But the wife makes a mean buttermilk tart if yer fixin to soothe the savage belly. That bear-man behind you looks like he might could use a bite.”

Rip Terrorgrip looks side to side, as if there were perhaps another bear-man nearby to which the halfling could be referring. He opens his mouth to say something, but is cut off by the cheerful halfman, “Yup, horses, hay and buttermilk tarts, that’s all this humble hostler knows.” He begins to whistle tunelessly as he goes back to shoveling manure.

Looking rather confusedly at one another, we decide that this halfling may have an ill-fitting reputation and bid him a fine day (after taking one of Ma Thistleton’s tarts for the road.)

Taking the bull by the horns, we then crossed town to visit the Upper Quays of the docks just as night begins to fall, in the hopes of seeing some treachery or malign behavior.

Having learned from various townsfolk that a local street tough by the name of Strongbeard has been charging ‘taxes’ to those wishing to move goods from the lower quays to the upper, and has begun to extend his taxes to local merchants and shopowners, lest they fall victim to his merry band of goons.

We head into House Azaer’s Emporium to ask the shopkeep about it. A beautiful Tiefling lady steps from behind the counter to greet us. As she catches sight of the dragonborn trailing behind her face screws up into a look of disgust, remebling a well-aged pumpkin. Roderick, noticing the shift, attempts to remedy the situation and get her talking.

“If you want to buy something, do it and get out. Be sure to take your mangy CUR of a dragonborn with you, as he’s spoiling my merchandise.”

Glancing at Hurin, Roderick attempts a bluff, “Who? Him? He’s not with us. I have no idea where he came from,” he says, trying not to look at his direction. Hurin, out of earshot, looks at Roderick and gives a big thumbs up with a beaming smile. With a nod and a wink, Roderick attempts to let Hurin know he should perhaps wait outside. Once he has trotted outside the store, Amara Azaer (the tiefling) brightens considerably, and doesn’t seem to notice Hurin standing at the window, foggin the glass and writing “Hurin and Roderick, BFF Forever” in the fog.

Once the dragonborn is out of the shop, Amara seems to relax, and is put at ease by the gnome’s easy nature and flowing wit. She tells him that Strongbeard has been roughing up local shops that won’t pay protection money, and that the local guard has done nothing to stop it. When asked where we might find Strongbeard, she didn’t know, only that the only time you knew he’d be around is if you tried to move something from one quay to another.

The bear-man shouts “OOOH!” and begins to rummage in his pack, producing a disguist kit and exlaims, “I have an idea.”

A few minutes later, our merry band of heroes has transformed, as if by magic, into hte very picture of stevedores. If you looked up ‘dock worker’ in the dictionary, t here would be a picture of us next to it. The genasi even had a very convincing mole.

Gathering some empty boxes about, we set off to the lower quays, complaining loudly about having to schlep this stuff from one quay to another, and how far it is to go, and how we hope we don’t get molested by any local street toughs.

Sure enough, within a few minutes, some beefy goons appear before us.

“Oi! Where d’ya think you’re goin? You hain’t paid the taxes for movin these goods yet.”

“My good sir, I wasn’t aware of any taxes that we, as humble dock workers, would need to pay.”

“Well, because you seem new, and look the very picture of dock-workers, we’ll let you only pay half this time. 5 gold pieces for each of ya.” The goon says, walking over to the genasi and shoving the box he’s carrying. A hollow thud resounds in the square, clearly demonstrating that there is nothing in the box.

“OI! What you tryin to pull, ‘ere! Dis box is empty!”

Roderick, thinking quickly, explains that the genasi is new and they’re training him by letting him carry empty boxes to see if he can handle them right. This begins a debate with the none-too-bright goon on training methods of dockhands. Just as they’re approaching a resolution a loud whistle comes from the Tavern nearby. A small dwarf with a very strong beard steps from the door….....

to be continued.

Shopping for items
  • If you sell any standard adventuring equipment/items looted off bad guys you get 1/5 the price in the book and can be done offline, just let me know what was sold and for how much. If you’re selling magic equipment/items the price can be haggled over and should be done so at a gaming session.
  • As recently recruited members of the Fallcrest city guard, you now get 10% off the price of any items you wish to buy. This includes magic equipment/items. This can be done offline as well.
  • If you want to rebuild your character at any time, or feel like you want to try something new I’m totally cool with that, within reason. If you create a brand new character, you don’t get to keep any of the shiny magic items or equipment you may have purchased/collected up to that point. If you just want to rebuild/tweak your current character (it’s the same character with a couple different powers or attribute points or something like that) I’m cool with that at any time, especially when a new book comes out (like Primal Power next month). I only ask that you don’t engage in excessive rebuilds, so no Dingo Axemaul version 8 in as many sessions. It’s more important to me that everyone has fun rather than feeling stuck with a power they don’t use.

I'm sorry, but we no longer support this web browser. Please upgrade your browser or install Chrome or Firefox to enjoy the full functionality of this site.